ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

INTRODUCTIONS

CHAPTER 1
Simone de Beauvoir Was Totally Hot
Say no to ho and yes to eccentric glamour

PROFILE
Tilda Swinton

CHAPTER 2
A Small Quantity of Spit
Guarding your self-esteem, not to mention your maquillage

PROFILE
Dita Von Teese

CHAPTER 3
What the Hookers Are Wearing
The meaning of snakeskin culottes

PROFILE
Iman

CHAPTER 4
Freud's Handbag
Nobody wants an old clutch

PROFILE
Isabel Toledo

CHAPTER 5
Call Ghost Bustiers
Exorcising your vintage clothing

PROFILE
Mr. Mickey Boardman

CHAPTER 6
Aunt Sylvia's Fanny Pack
A career a la mode

PROFILE
Iris Apfel

CHAPTER 7
Looking Cher
Tempus fugit, so get used to it

PROFILE
Alexandra Jacobs

CHAPTER 8
Who Killed Joie de Vivre?
Squeeze a lemon on the cat and shout, "Sourpuss!"

PROFILE
Malcolm Gladwell

CHAPTER 9
Frenchwomen Don't Know Diddly
Vive la vulgarite!

PROFILE
Kelly Wearstler

CHAPTER 10
A Large Woman on a Small Stool
An etiquette for the twenty-first century

PROFILE
Amy Fine Collins

CHAPTER 11
A-List Celebs Don't Puke in Their Purses
Fame and the glam eccentric

PROFILE
Lynn Yaeger

CHAPTER 12
Hurl Your Arms Heavenward
A glam eccentric guide to weight loss

PROFILE
Beth Rudin DeWoody

CHAPTER 13
Soothing or Annoying
The glam eccentric guide to love

PROFILE
Lucy Liu

CHAPTER 14
Splash Your Breasts with Ice-Cold Water
Lousy advice with chilling consequences

PROFILE
Hamish Bowles

CHAPTER 15
Dressing Down Is a Crime Against Humanity
Don't hide your eccentric glamour under a bushel

POSTSCRIPT
Isabella Blow